Avoiding eye-contact with God

That's what I feel like I've been doing for the past few weeks. All too aware of the ways that I am not measuring up, I put Him off because I feel unworthy of His presence. The subconscious line of thought is that once I just clean myself up a little better I can approach Him.

So silly. Really. Of course I can't measure up. As long as I try, or delude myself into thinking I can, I embrace my selfish pride. I fail often. Let's get that out of the way now, so I can just accept the freely given grace, and the truth that I am forgiven!

Makes me think of a quote that stood out for me in Brother Lawrence's "Practicing the Presence of God":

"When an occasion of practicing some virtue was offered, he addressed himself to God saying, 'Lord, I cannot do this unless Thou enablest me'. Then he received strength more than sufficient. When he had failed in his duty, he only confessed his fault saying to God, 'I shall never do otherwise, if You leave me to myself. It is You who must hinder my failing and mend what is amiss.' Then, after this, he gave himself no further uneasiness about it."

and this one:
"He said he was very aware of his faults, but not discouraged by them. He confessed them to God and made no excuses. Then, he peaceably resumed his usual practice of love and adoration."

LORD Jesus, I thank You that I cannot earn your love, OR Your acceptance!