Fog-shrouded wilderness

I just had an amazing phone call with my mom. As He often has over the years, God spoke truth through her to me, and I sit here now marvelling in joy and thanksgiving.

I've been doing the devotionals every week for a class at North Park, and last night, since the scheduled speaker (Donnie) was sick, I helped another girl, Steph, to fill in. The subject: Spiritual Warfare. I am so underqualified to do so many of the things I find myself doing.

I told my mom about it, and she thought it was interesting that it worked out that way, since spiritual warfare has been one of the heavy things on my mind in the past weeks and months.

God has been rooting me in truth in the past year, affirming my identity in Christ, completely apart from what I do. He has been a father holding my chubby toddler knuckles as I take wobbly steps forward, learning to walk in the spirit, letting Christ live His life through me. More recently, although I am still learning vital lessons in those two areas, I sense Him leading me into battle- asking me to stand firm (Eph 6:11).

God has been pretty clearly calling me out in a specific way. To be honest, it feels foolish, and doesn't make a lot of sense to me. I find it hard to explain, and when I rationalize, I find myself telling God that
1.) I don't want to
2.) He can and should ask someone else
3.) I don't have the strength to face what He is asking

I've found that my rationalizations don't usually convince God. :)

I've gone back and forth so many times in my mind. Sermons, words from others, and scripture have all confirmed what I think He is asking. So I say, "ok God, I'll obey." And then there is perfect peace. Then a bit further down the line, I start thinking about the risks involved, and second-guessing, and I tell myself that I've misheard Him. And then there is gut-wrenching anxiety. Round and round it has gone.

Talking to my mom this morning was so good because she shared how things that God has layed on her heart often haven't made sense, and she has been on that same journey. I also saw the way she has obeyed, when it just didn't seem to make any sense at all... and how she is so sensitive to His voice.

I realize that I will not cultivate an awareness and sensitivity to His voice if I do not obey Him in these small things.

One of my mom's prayer for me for years has been Isaiah 30:21 "Your ears will hear a word behind you, 'This is the way, walk in it,' whenever you turn to the right or to the left."

Sometimes, on this path He has me on, all I see ahead is untamed, dangerous wilderness. To the left or right I see paths branching off that are paved and complete with street signs. I take a step or two onto them, and the voice behind me directs me back. So on I go into the fog-shrouded wilderness.

"My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me" John 10:27

Grumpy Jennifer

This past week and a half, I got 2 flat tires, my car broke down, and my purse broke. Donnie, our executive director has been sick and in the hospital (he is now recovering at home). Things look positive, but he gave us quite a scare. Since I work quite closely with him, it has thrown me off things at work. Then, starting Saturday and finishing a half hour ago, we've had a candidate orientation program (COP), welcoming 4 great new people to PIONEERS. COP is always one of the craziest and most draining times of the year.

Yesterday I felt like I was simply at the end of my resources, and I found myself grabbing a quiet moment in my office, grumpy and wanting a good cry. I started a post complaining about the week. As I wrote about my flat tires, I remembered how a co-worker had changed one for me in about 10 minutes, and the other I was able to get to the gas station in time to fill up. As I wrote about my car breaking down, I was reminded of how Donnie & Beth had leant me their car for the week. And then of how Steve & Amanda came from Cambridge and Steve fixed my car for me in about 15 minutes. And then my purse that broke? Out of the blue a friend gave me a new one.

Over and over I was reminded of God's material and practical provision for me. I had been wallowing in my weakness, feeling irritable and just not up to being around people yesterday evening. When He reminded me of His provision with my car and etc, He reminded me that He had provided for me in every way. All the patience, strength, wisdom and more that I needed was available to me in Christ. I just had to step forward with the faith that He would be enough in that moment.

So I stepped forward, and He provided.

More and more the desire of my heart coming to the surface, is to be a channel of God's love to others. I want my life to be an expression of God's love to the world. Learning my way into the fulfillment of that (so much to learn!) I find the times it is most needed I feel least able to offer it. I remind myself though of the truth that God has made all I need available to me in Christ. My inadequacy is a good thing, because I need to step forward in faith that He is enough and allow Him to love through me.

And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ
Ephesians 1:3

tupperware party

Who wants to come to a Tupperware party?
It is tonight at 7 pm at my house. I got a bunch of tupperware a few years ago, and below are the before and after pictures of our pantry cupboard. I love Tupperware! :)

BEFORE:

AFTER:

**ok I don't have a good excuse for why it was so bad before, but the Tupperware sure helped!**

Life plans and goals

I'm reviewing my yearly "personal life plan." I chuckle as I read 2004's, because I recognize how much my perspective has changed. 2004's plan was so performance-driven with concrete goals (and aim of developing high self-discipline to achieve them). After yet another burn-out cycle, I let God begin to shift my thinking.

Last year I couldn't even bring myself to make up a "personal life plan" for 2005. I determined to know Christ, to be consumed by His love, and to learn to let Him live out through me. I don't want to cultivate self-discipline anymore... I want to cultivate Christ-discipline... letting Him have control. I want to walk in more and more in surrender.

I've been way more productive this way, though not with the flashy minisiry achievements I used to aim for. This remains my goal: to let Christ live and love through me. I want my life to be the natural outflow/overflow of His grace and love to others. I'm only in jr kindergarten in this school, but at least I can sit all the way through class now without poking the kid next to me. :)

I also have a fun life goal list "Things to do before I die." Here are some of them:

• Learn to surf
• Go skydiving
  
• Run a marathon
  
• Go bungee jumping
• Visit an active volcano
  
• Travel to every continent (including Antarctica!)
• Perfect my French
• Learn one other language (Arabic, Mandarin... ?)
• Swim with sharks (real ones, I saw it on tv once, you can do it in a cage, while the great whites circle around you :) )

Another winter day... I'm obsessed with this desire to surf. The few "attempts" I've made in New Zealand and Nova Scotia got me hooked. I will find a way... :)

God- the Prodigal Giver

At North Park Saturday night something Pastor Terry shared really stuck with me. He said that the "prodigal son" story would be more aptly called the "prodigal father" story.

I always thought prodigal meant "way-ward" or "rebellious." What it actually means is "recklessly extravagant." I looked it up on dictionary.com (see definition).

It is a story about the recklessly extravagant love of the father... essentially, the recklessly extravagant love of our Father.

It certainly rips apart my old ideas about God's love being sterile and dry, loving us because He has to. What has been sticking with me from this story is how extravagant the father's love was... he didn't just affirm the restoration of relationship, and didn't just give the son what he needed... He gave him so much more. He wouldn't even let the son try to make it up, or earn his approval. Recklessly extravagant.

"He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?" (Romans 8:32)

Sometimes those other good things He offers come in the form of brokenness and even suffering. And sometimes, they are just good and pure gifts that He delights in giving.

I heard Malcolm Smith say in a sermon once that God's love is not an emotion, but it is emotional.

It seems like every day God is breaking out of the boxes that I try to put Him in.

(painting: Rembrandt's "Return of the Prodigal Son")

Thank you- yes YOU! :)

I'm sitting here, chilling to Jack Johnson and Michael Buble. Melanie is laughing at how mellow I've been lately, at least in my music choices. Her office is right next to mine, so I guess she should know.

I just wanted to say thank you- to you!

When I started this blog, I didn't expect people would actually read it, figured it was a long shot anyway. I just love to write, and I especially love to share snapshots of my journey, of how God is teaching me.

I am constantly being surprised by the people that read this blog, either occasionally or regularly. Thank you for your comments, and emails. Others I find out through random connections.

Sometimes it freaks me out, because- follow me on this- when I started writing on here, I just wrote what was on my mind. I'm generally a pretty open person, so I don't have trouble sharing this stuff either in person or in writing. But as more people read this, I find myself surprised, and not sure exactly why. What freaks me out is the fear that I am going to do or say something and mess it all up.

I've concluded now though that that's a good risk to take. Not because I'm not likely to do or say something stupid (or that I havent' already!) but because I'm on here to share my journey with you, and journeys are messy, and I've missed the point if I try to hide that.

So, thanks for reading, thanks for commenting, emailing me, or whatever. If you read something stupid, by all means, call me on it! I certainly don't have it all figured out... as is definitely clear by now. :)

God's good gifts

I have realized that I sometimes have trouble believing that God has good gifts for me.

Am I alone in this? Sometimes when I think about what blessings the future might hold, I immediately think of how they will probably be wrenched away, or soiled in some way. When someone does something nice for me, I often feel embarassed. I feel guilty having nice things.

I guess the root of this is feeling like I don't deserve God's blessings. I wouldn't say that I've had major struggles with self-esteem, it's more my pride that wants to "earn" the things that come my way. It's a slander of God's character really, that I have to repent of, as my mind is renewed daily. How easily I forget the basics of the gospel- that Christ did it all without my help. While we were yet sinners...

I've been reminding myself of what I know of His character. I've been thinking lately though, that one of the best things I can do to redeem that distorted mind-set, is to really look at the good things He has already given. What are some of those things?

My family and closest friends- They are incredible, what else can I say. People who love me even though they have seen the absolute worst sides of me. God loves and speaks to me through them, accepting me as I am, but not content to let me stay there.

My work- I have an amazing job working for PIONEERS Canada. I look forward to it when I wake up in the morning, and except for the occasional mid-afternoon slump, I enjoy my work days. The other day we had a whole day of meetings, preparation for an orientation we have coming up. It was so much fun, working things through together, feeding off each other, pushing each other's thoughts and ideas further than we could on our own. I think the word for that is synergy. There are always new challenges and opportunities to grow, and there are lots of outlets for my creative energies. Maybe the best part though is that I am given the room to fail, get up and learn from it, and am mentored through it all.

Just good gifts. My Father is good to me. He is good to me in the hard times, the good times, and most often the times that have a bit of both!

Celebration of love

I may be single, and looking forward to a girl's night out this evening, but just because I don’t have romantic love in my life doesn’t mean I don’t have cause to celebrate!

When I stop to think about it I am awed by God’s love for me. It’s perfect, it’s precious, and it blows my mind.

I’ve said often that one of the first songs I ever learned was probably “Jesus loves me.” I remember teaching children in many Sunday school classes that truth myself. But it has only been in the past few years that the truth of it has come alive to me.

In a time of brokenness I began to question God about whether or not He cared when I was hurting, whether or not He could feel my pain. I thought of His love being impersonal (meant for the whole world after all), and of Him dryly telling me it was all for the best. I was cynical, but those questions opened up a door for me to consider the possibility that God offered what I hungered for.

And so began a journey into His love. Printed off and framed, sitting on my desk are the following verses which have summed up this leg of the journey:

“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father… that He would grant you,
according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His
Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith;
and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with
all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know
the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to the
fullness of God.”

To be filled up to the fullness of God means to know His love. That’s my journey right now, and probably for my life. Sometimes He gives it to me directly, but most often He offers it through friends, family members, and sometimes even strangers. It was always there, but He has renewed my eyes to show me the source.

Underneath all the “proper” theology I held, I used to compare what I felt God’s love for me to be, with the purest love I had experienced from others, or given. God’s love seemed so dry and sterile in comparison. Now I see, that real love always has God as it’s source… whether the giver or the receiver ever realize it.

And today, I just want to say how thankful I am to have received that love from my God, my Abba, my Husband, my Protector and my Strength. I’m also thankful for His love as I have received it through countless friends, family members, and others.

So, thanks, and Happy Valentine's day!

Anniversary

February 10th and March 13th are always strange days for me. Today (Feb 10th) is the anniversary of when my sister Ashley died, and March 13th is her birthday. I've never been one for dates and anniversaries being a huge deal, but for some reason this one seems big to me. Each year anniversary is like a century, or like some huge milestone separating me from that defining event.

I don't really like it actually. The passing of time brings healing, yes, but it is a little unsettling as well, because I don't want such a huge thing to be lost in my distant past. I don't want such an important person to become, with the passing of time, a far-off, and seemingly unreal memory.

And then there is always the fear of forgetting her. Sometimes I close my eyes and remember the purity and mischief in her smile. Sometimes I concentrate on remembering the softness of her hands as I held them at her bedside while she slowly passed from us. Those were moments that I tried to cherish, and imprint on my memory, having spent too many days and years not realizing our time would be so short.

There are tears in my eyes, but it is not all sad. There is joy also, in the remembrance of God's complete faithfulness, and wonder at the still unveiling masterpiece of His overarching plan.

I miss her so much, and I've given up thinking that that longing will ever go away. But I wouldn't change a thing because God was good in ways that words do not do justice to describe. And there is always the knowledge that I will see her again.

Being Mocked: The Essence of Christ's Work, Not Muhammed's

Article by John Piper: February 8, 2006
What we saw this past week in the Islamic demonstrations over the Danish cartoons of Muhammad was another vivid depiction of the difference between Muhammad and Christ, and what it means to follow each. Not all Muslims approve the violence. But a deep lesson remains: The work of Muhammad is based on being honored and the work of Christ is based on being insulted. This produces two very different reactions to mockery.

If Christ had not been insulted, there would be no salvation. This was his saving work: to be insulted and die to rescue sinners from the wrath of God. Already in the Psalms the path of mockery was promised: “All who see me mock me; they make mouths at me; they wag their heads” (Psalm 22:7). “He was despised and rejected by men . . . as one from whom men hide their faces . . . and we esteemed him not” (Isaiah 53:3).

When it actually happened it was worse than expected. “They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and twisting together a crown of thorns, they put it on his head. . . . And kneeling before him, they mocked him, saying, ‘Hail, King of the Jews!’ And they spit on him” (Matthew 27:28-30). His response to all this was patient endurance. This was the work he came to do. “Like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth” (Isaiah 53:7).

This was not true of Muhammad. And Muslims do not believe it is true of Jesus. Most Muslims have been taught that Jesus was not crucified. One Sunni Muslim writes, “Muslims believe that Allah saved the Messiah from the ignominy of crucifixion.”1 Another adds, “We honor [Jesus] more than you [Christians] do. . . . We refuse to believe that God would permit him to suffer death on the cross.”2 An essential Muslim impulse is to avoid the “ignominy” of the cross.

That’s the most basic difference between Christ and Muhammad and between a Muslim and a follower of Christ. For Christ, enduring the mockery of the cross was the essence of his mission. And for a true follower of Christ enduring suffering patiently for the glory of Christ is the essence of obedience. “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account” (Matthew 5:11). During his life on earth Jesus was called a bastard (John 8:41), a drunkard (Matthew 11:19), a blasphemer (Matthew 26:65), a devil (Matthew 10:25); and he promised his followers the same: “If they have called the master of the house Beelzebul, how much more will they malign those of his household” (Matthew 10:25).

The caricature and mockery of Christ has continued to this day. Martin Scorsese portrayed Jesus in The Last Temptation of Christ as wracked with doubt and beset with sexual lust. Andres Serrano was funded by the National Endowment for the Arts to portray Jesus on a cross sunk in a bottle of urine. The Da Vinci Code portrays Jesus as a mere mortal who married and fathered children.

How should his followers respond? On the one hand, we are grieved and angered. On the other hand, we identify with Christ, and embrace his suffering, and rejoice in our afflictions, and say with the apostle Paul that vengeance belongs to the Lord, let us love our enemies and win them with the gospel. If Christ did his work by being insulted, we must do ours likewise.
When Muhammad was portrayed in twelve cartoons in the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten, the uproar across the Muslim world was intense and sometimes violent. Flags were burned, embassies were torched, and at least one Christian church was stoned. The cartoonists went into hiding in fear for their lives, like Salman Rushdie before them. What does this mean?
It means that a religion with no insulted Savior will not endure insults to win the scoffers. It means that this religion is destined to bear the impossible load of upholding the honor of one who did not die and rise again to make that possible. It means that Jesus Christ is still the only hope of peace with God and peace with man. And it means that his followers must be willing to “share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death” (Philippians 3:10).

"How are you?"

Does anyone else ever feel like they aren't being completely honest when they say "fine" in answer to the above question seventeen times a day?

Well, to be accurate, I don't really feel like I am lying when I say I am doing well, I just often don't feel like I am telling the whole story. I guess I just figure, how many people actually want to know the whole story? A lot of times people just ask in passing, not waiting for an answer. I know I've done that myself, though I dislike it when people do it to me.

I guess I answer the question based on more than just how I feel. On a given day, I may feel down or discouraged, but if I were to launch into a depressing tirade about my negative feelings, I wouldn't be telling the whole story anyway. It seems to me to be a strange paradox, but I'm learning that the journey of faith is full of those. I can "feel" crappy, but have a general sense that my life is going well, and that God is doing good things in it. My feelings are not the indicators of reality. They are indicators of other things, such as what I am believing deep down, sometimes without even realizing it.

It is nice though to have a few people with whom I can be completely transparent, who help me dig down below the surface to uncover the lies that I believe, and who walk with me and accept me- the good, the bad, and the ugly! Praise God for good friendships, and family members!

One thing stands out to me in all of this though. The many times I get standard answers from people: is it because I'm just not in that inner trust circle or because they think I'm not actually interested in them? What concerns me is not that I think I need to be everyone's confidante, but that I don't want to be a person who unconsciously discourages others from being real and transparent with me. I don't want to communicate that my acceptance is based on performance, appearance, or success. I've been thinking a lot lately about how I really want the main thing of my life to be that the love of God flows through me to other people, but I am all too aware at how rarely and imperfectly that happens. I am so glad that God is the One continually at work in me!

Man of the Year Awards

Before you go any further, let me just assert that I am not into "Men-bashing." These are just pictures someone sent me a while back that I thought were hilarious. I hope you enjoy them too. :)

Man of the Year #1


Man of the year #2


Man of the Year #3

What a day!

Whew! Wednesday was quite a day. I am still recovering from it, though not as much as others.

Terrible road conditions, and a bit of carelessness caused me to do a full 180 with my car on the way to work. It freaked me out a bit, but wasn't a huge deal.

Another co-worker got their car stuck in a snowdrift and had to dig it out.

Then, at the end of the day, my friend Melanie and I decided that we would go to the mall straight from work. Since we live a distance apart, we were driving separately until we got to a more central location. She made a comment about being nervous driving in the current conditions, and we decided she would just follow me.

Well, a few kilometres along the way, I looked into my rearview mirror and on a particularly icy patch saw her lose control of the car as it veered into the oncoming traffic lane. She tried to correct it, but it swerved out of control, finally facing the direction it had come. I wasn't too worried until I saw her sail off the edge of the road, and I saw the underbelly of her car as it began to roll down an embankment, landing right side up.

It was one of the scariest things I've ever seen in my life! I quickly stopped and jumped out of my car, promptly slipping ont he ice and falling flat on my face. Getting up (and feeling like a cartoon character, my legs moving but my body staying in place) I ran to where the car was sitting in a snow bank with it's nose almost dipping into an unfrozen creek. It was such a relief to find her sitting there, conscious in her car. A few other cars stopped, and brought blankets, and I called 911 on my new cell phone.

PRAISE THE LORD she was ok. A concussion and lots of bruises, but she is recovering nicely now, and with a good attitude about it all. We are thankful for the little mercies that God provided that kept this from being so much worse. The emergency personnel who came (VERY quickly, I might add) emphasized how lucky she was.

I'm not a Strong Christian

I said this to some people recently, and I think I sounded kind of crazy. I think maybe they wondered why I was admitting such a thing.

Looking back to the days when I first "gave in" and offered God all of me, I realize that underneath it all I thought I had a lot to offer Him. I held mentors and Christian leaders up on pedestals, and made it my goal to be a strong Christian. I also became a judgmental person, but that seemed insignificant compared to the gains I was able to make using my willpower to become a moral and upright person, active in the ministry.

I have to say, I'm disillusioned with all of that now. Don't get me wrong, this is not to say that I am disillusioned with God. Indeed not. I'm disillusioned, you could say, with myself.

I can't change myself. I have a strong will-power, but that's no use to God. My will-power was never even remotely sucessful in changing anything but the outside. The only real changes have come when I have acknowledged my helplessness to God, allowing Him to work.

So now, I joyfully acknowledge that I am WEAK. With that acknowledgement, so many ridiculous burdens fall from my shoulders. The burden to be something. The burden to impress. The burden and pressure to be perfect.

It all goes back to that original lie in the Garden of Eden that we don't need God, and can do it ourselves. He never expected me to; so shrugging off that burden I skip happily along my way.

Anyone else want a bracelet that says "LIVE WEAK"? :)

Frantic pace

Be glad as you read this that you are not with me in person, because
1.) I would probably whine about being sick, and
2.) I can't pass on any germs over the internet

Last week I didn't post because life was going at a frantic pace. I worked my usual hours at PIONEERS, diving into my new responsibilities I have taken on there, and also did five shifts at Christian Horizons. It seemed like a good idea back in December when I agreed to do the relief shifts.

I have been so proud of myself over the last year or so for how I have slowed down my life, and limited my commitments, having learned some vital lessons about healthy boundaries. As someone who has regularly burned herself out since high school, I am learning to live a more healthy life, no longer suffering under the delusion that I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders.

That said, I still make stupid choices sometimes, and then I pay for them. Donnie (my boss) called me on it today, and I appreciated the gentle rebuke. It was all the more humbling because we had just had a discussion about leadership and ministry, and how most leaders' identities are tied so closely to what they do (as opposed to who they are in Christ), that they take on so much more than is necessary, healthy, or even expected by God.

So, that is my humble confession on a Monday morning, still experiencing repercussions from bad decisions, but learning all the way through. :)

Yesterday I believed that summer is real

Yesterday I was driving to work, and it was a beautiful day. The sun was peeking out from behind the clouds, and the temperature was shockingingly warm for January in Southern Ontario.

I was car-pooling with my friend Melanie, and thinking of how summer usually feels like a mere dream when we are entrenched in the long dark coldness of winter, I remarked to her: "Today, I believe that summer is real."

She thought for a moment, and then said to me, "What do you think God is trying to tell you through that?"

"Uhhh... I don't know... what do you think?"

She smiled. "I think He's telling you that summer is real."

I rolled my eyes. "I thought you were going to come up with some deep truth from that."

"There is- I think He is reminding you that the 'spring' and 'summer' of life are real too, even when you are in the winter and don't feel like it's possible."

I ruminated on that for a while. I had been talking with her the evening before about how I feel like I am in a dark valley right now, and have been for a long time. There are many great things in my life that I am so thankful for- but underneath everything is a deep sadness. I told her that I have trouble believing that the valley will ever end.

The past 4 years have been tough ones, and through it all, God has taught me that He offers precious gifts in brokenness. I have found Him in my brokenness, and I wouldn't trade anything for that. I'm in a painful valley, but I know that there is firm ground underneath my feet. I know that God is with me. Sometimes He feels far away, like right now, but there is something even deeper than feelings- a certainty that He is good and He loves me.

Yesterday though, He reminded me, through a warm day and a good friend, that the valley is not all there is- or ever will be.

Back to normal life

Here are some more pictures from the New Year, and my time in NB. I'm back in ON now, back to work and back to normal life. I was sad to leave my family, but it will be nice to get back into a bit of a schedule (oh no- I am one of those people!)


After a games night with the family, we went out to a restaurant in Moncton to celebrate the New Year: here are Deven and Heather.

Here I am with my sister, and our friend Melissa.

Making a gingerbread house with my cousins

We had some leftover frosting to have fun with...

The finished product.... ta-da!

She's still got it!

I have been having a great time with my family. Lots of laughs, and good memories made: evenings sitting up talking with mom, dad and Melanie. Watching "Joan of Arcadia" episodes with Mel. My dad asking me what I am going to put on my "blob" (Dad- it's b-l-o-G). Sitting around reading. Eating too much.

I went to Walmart with some others, and the following exchange occurred between one of my shopping companions, and a man we crossed paths with:

"Doris! Is that you? How are you?"

"Hello ____, I'm well, how are you?"

"Can't complain... wow- Doris you look so good!" he said with an appreciative look.

"Well, I just turned ___ years old." She said, deflecting his obvious admiration.

"Oh Doris, you don't look like you've aged a day..." He paused and as he looked at her, I think I saw a glimmer of moisture in his eyes. "Doris, you're really looking great... it's so good to see you."

Finally, seeing that it was awkward not to introduce me and my sister, she did, but he quickly turned back to her. After more comments on how great she looked, and somewhat emotional reassurances of how glad he was to see her, he went on his way.

I waited until he was well out of earshot to start teasing Doris-my grandmother about the man who was hitting on her right in front of her grandchildren. She's still got it I guess. :) Not everything gets passed down. :)

My Big Fat French Family

My family makes me laugh. When a bunch of us are together, it is so busy, bustling, loud, and food is everywhere. It really does make me think of that movie...

A few snapshots: I got picked up at the airport and whisked away to supper at a new fastfood joint my mom had scoped out. My uncle had brought a young friend of his, and I had to laugh at the predicament of a poor unsuspecting visitor to our family- as he was pressed to eat more food than he could possibly eat. Everyone passed food around and shared this and that, talking louder and louder in conversations that criss-crossed the table in complicated ways.

We were on our way to see the Chronicles of Narnia. My sister bought some candy to smuggle into the theatre, and among the wealth of sweets she had were some of those fake teeth and gums thingies. The kids were having fun putting them in their mouths and smiling like they were real teeth. My 9-year-old cousin wanted to join the fun, and with his little Acadian accent (no pronouncing of "th's") he innocently said, "mom, can I have a teet'?" I busted my gut laughing right at the table, but no one else caught it until I told them after.

After eating we packed up and headed to the theatre, candy stashed in pockets and purses. I have fond memories of my pre-teen shame when going to a movie with a bunch of aunts who had decided that the movie-going experience wouldn't be complete without popcorn. So they popped some corn and brought it with them. It wouldn't have been so bad, except that I remember going through the movie ticket line-up with my aunt, who's purse was literally steaming! Good times.

Tonight we had a gathering at my aunt & uncle's. It was a fun time, as usual, with lots of laughs, hugs, and of course, too much food. I told them my comparison of our family to the Greek one in "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." We had a good laugh, and then they began to argue over which aunt it would be who would tell tales of the surgery on the growth on her neck that had yielded bits of hair, teeth and bone. They settled on one, and my mom told her: "you'd be the one with the growth- with the hair and the teet'!" Hehe... we are geeks, it's true... but it's fun.

FUN TIMES... :)

Getting ready for Christmas

Well, the Christmas season is always a busy one. I have to say though, that I am enjoying it. I don't enjoy looking for parking at the mall, or getting lost in it (as I do every time! you'd think I'd learn...) but overall, it has been good.

I'm not a big gift person, but I have enjoyed getting gifts for my family, baking cookies for friends, and sending my christmas cards. I think what I have enjoyed about it all is that it has reminded me of how many amazing people have become part of my life. I don't really care if I get any more gifts, it's not really point. Of course you know that, no need for a sermon from me on the subject. :)

This past weekend I got to see a friend test for her advanced blue belt in Tae Kwon Do (go Lisa!), celebrate another friend's passing into the third decade (happy birthday to someone. :) ), and enjoyed a chinese-canadian Christmas feast (thanks Wayne and Irene!) The rest of the week is going to be busy, as I try to tie up loose ends here at the office in preparation for a 2 week holiday in New Brunswick.

*Home* on Thursday- I can't wait!